(insert something witty)

Your honor, I am here today to make my case for why I believe that not all movies should get extended/director's cut versions put on their DVD releases. This is a pattern that has become all too prevalent in recent months, and it needs to stop. My first piece of evidence is the movie The 40 Year Old Virgin. This is a movie that was loved by almost everyone. This includes my closest friends, all of whom are well educated and who's opinions often mirror that of my own. It has been placed on top ten lists by a lot of the nations top critics. I was unfortunate enough, because of limited time and money, to not be able to see it in the theaters. Because of this, I rented it at my local Blockbuster. The copy that I rented was the extended edition, advertised as having 17 extra minutes on it. I was excited. The movie failed me. I could see why people liked it. There were very funny moments. The story and the characters were much more intriguing than most comedies that are released. The problem? It's 2 hour plus runtime. There are reasons directors delete scenes from their movies. It's called pacing. Keep the train moving. This puppy gets derailed multiple times. As soon as it would start up, and get me drawn back in, an unnecessarily long scene would take it right back off the track again. I'm not saying that we can't have director's cuts or extended versions of these movies out there. However, use some discretion. They should put footage back in if they feel it helps the movie, not just because they have it. Have some respect for the movie. I hope you can understand my feelings on this. There is nothing more disappointing than having a movie that is so highly regarded by everyone else bore you to tears. Thank you.