(insert something witty)

Your honor, I am here today to make my case for why I believe that not all movies should get extended/director's cut versions put on their DVD releases. This is a pattern that has become all too prevalent in recent months, and it needs to stop. My first piece of evidence is the movie The 40 Year Old Virgin. This is a movie that was loved by almost everyone. This includes my closest friends, all of whom are well educated and who's opinions often mirror that of my own. It has been placed on top ten lists by a lot of the nations top critics. I was unfortunate enough, because of limited time and money, to not be able to see it in the theaters. Because of this, I rented it at my local Blockbuster. The copy that I rented was the extended edition, advertised as having 17 extra minutes on it. I was excited. The movie failed me. I could see why people liked it. There were very funny moments. The story and the characters were much more intriguing than most comedies that are released. The problem? It's 2 hour plus runtime. There are reasons directors delete scenes from their movies. It's called pacing. Keep the train moving. This puppy gets derailed multiple times. As soon as it would start up, and get me drawn back in, an unnecessarily long scene would take it right back off the track again. I'm not saying that we can't have director's cuts or extended versions of these movies out there. However, use some discretion. They should put footage back in if they feel it helps the movie, not just because they have it. Have some respect for the movie. I hope you can understand my feelings on this. There is nothing more disappointing than having a movie that is so highly regarded by everyone else bore you to tears. Thank you.

So, Christmas was pretty good. It's sorta lost its luster in the last few years. Mostly because I usually know everything I'm getting well before the holiday. I think my favorite gift this year is The Complete Calvin and Hobbes. Reading through it so far has reminded me how much I love that strip. Not only how funny it is, but also the influence it had on my youth. This was a strip that laid out a lot of the frustrations I had as a child. And then as an adult understanding my own issues with art vs. commerce, and seeing those reflected in Watterson's own ideals was pretty awesome. I have unlimited respect for him and how he decided to end the strip. Plus, the vocabulary in that strip is probably the reason I talk so good. Anyway, it's awesome and I'm sure it will give me many an hour of entertainment.

Well, they still need a lot of help, but the Chiefs helped their case today. Of course, it's not really a good idea to put your fate in the hands of the Lions.

Can I tell you how excited I am for this? Not because I think it will be good, but because the press for it will be the final nail in the coffin that is Tom Cruise's sanity.

Listen, it's just a cell phone. You're not going to die if you don't have one. That person will want to talk to you just as much once you're at your office as they would when you were in your car. EVERYONE has them and they understand that shit happens. I'm not trying to say that your cell phone isn't important, or that its malfunctioning is not annoying. Far from it. I'm just saying that threatening me with physical violence is not going to help you. I didn't make the phone. I didn't build the towers. Just relax. It's going to be OK.

Also, yes, I agree, Bluetooth is a stupid name.

So, because I love you, my readers, I've gone through and edited the posts so that links are within the text. This makes it so much easier for you, my readers, to navigate wherever your hearts may take you. Now if I could just come up with a more consistant posting schedule.

While I do that, the website is going strong, so you should check it out. We're taking a break for the holidays, but rest assured that we will be back with lots more great content in the new year.